You may yell at your children on a daily basis and hardly notice it. There are parents who use shouting as another form of communication with their children, so that in this way, they listen to them. But yelling is never a good option because instead of communicating, it takes away emotionally and children end up being very resentful of their parents and the worst thing is that they assume that yelling to talk is okay. ‘The orange rhinoceros’ has arrived: a challenge for parents, so that they stop yelling at their children, what does it consist of?
Screaming affects children as much as if you hit them. They affect their personality, their development and therefore should not be used in the education of children, although there are times when parenting can overwhelm you. Although this theory is very good, the reality is that there are many parents who yell at their children daily and that is why the orange rhinoceros has been created, a platform to motivate parents to stop doing it.
Change the chip
Before talking about the orange rhino, if you are a parent who yells at their children, it is a good idea to reflect on your behavior. That you think about what makes you really scream. Your children are children and they are learning … But perhaps, the stress of work, the burden of homework, the lack of sleep or time, makes you feel irritation and yell more than necessary, without your children deserving those howls in any moment.
No parent wants to scream. The look of the children after a cry is heartbreaking and, furthermore, the feeling of guilt that later appears is also very painful. That is why, so that parents are aware and stop yelling, this platform has been created, would you sign up?
The orange rhino
Their website is in English but there is also a Facebook. The idea has been created by an American woman and mother who has four children (6, 5, 3 and 21 months), who does not work and is at home with them. A mother who screamed because she did not know how to deal with many everyday situations and did not do it on the street because of the ‘what will they say’ about others.
Suddenly she began to think that the opinion of others mattered little to her and that she should worry about what her children thought of her or how her screaming might affect them in the future. So she challenged herself to stop yelling at her children for a whole year, that is, 365 days without raising her voice. Now, the year has passed and he is able to scream less and love a lot more.
Since then, many parents around the world have known this challenge and have decided to join in, adapting the goals to each one’s real life. The challenge has some clear points that if you want to achieve you must follow. The most important points are:
- Be clear that there is a lack of communication with the children.
- Wanting to change and having the will to do so.
- Set realistic goals that can be met (it doesn’t have to be a whole year, it can be a week or as many days as you see fit).
- Discuss it with your loved ones to feel obligated to comply with it.
- Reflect on when and why it is yelled, write down everything you believe to start anticipating in future occasions and anticipate when it may happen to start avoiding it.
- Keep a motto in mind: ‘You can’t always control your children’s actions, but you can control your reaction.’
With or without challenge your children need understanding parents who listen to them, support them and love them unconditionally. If you ever yell at them because you lose your nerves, the important thing above all is that you do not blame yourself too much and look for solutions and also, that you apologize to your children for having yelled at them, thus taking responsibility for your actions.